Wake Up

It's the things we don't say,
                         The words that will never leave our lips,
                                                              That really cut us to the core...
I.
It's cold, cruel, and calculating,
Stop playing tug of war with my heart,
Dragging me into the mud with you;
I don't want to roll around in all the filth,
It's disgusting to me, riddled with negativity...

Dancing along the edge of the knife,
                             The blades of steel help me find my nerve again.

I stand on the precipice of a broken frontier;
Take my advice, take it from someone who's been there,
Never build your dreams out of glass,
Lest you seek for them to be shattered,
Right in front of you, with a hammer...

But it still couldn't patch
                  All of the damage you have done.

II.
The hatred I can feel from you is maddening,
I once thought you loved me,
But it's becoming clearer every day,
The rain clouds melting away,
You and I are enemies...

It's raining again,
                Just as it rains every night,
                                     Washing away what is left of my soul.

I am torn to shreds each and every day,
As I always have been, in passing,
Beaten and rattled to my very core...
And all of this emotional wreckage,
Sinking the ship that my soul once sailed in...

And I will go down with the ship,
                              Taking my taste of life, with baited breath.

III.
I'll stand alone, thank you,
I'd much rather rest in solitude,
Than put on a show for petty people,
Caught up in their webs of lies,
Both of you are ridiculous.

I can see past the mask,
                         The great rift between what you say
                                                        And what you choose to do...

All I've ever gotten from you were broken promises,
You think I'm on the other side...
Well, there shouldn't be any sides to this,
That's what I've been trying to show you all along,
However, it eludes your grasp; you will never get it.

You're just too blind to ever see,
                          All of the ways in which I die,
                                                   Each and every time, you kill me...


IV.
I am just saddened and deeply hurt;
I only want to be alone, I want to be free...
I want to go back to the place
Where my soul has wings,
And my heart can roam without restraint.

If I don't have that, then...
                               I am nothing.

I try to be this dreaded thing called normal,
And each moment, my soul aches,
I cry out, as I am filled with despair,
Trying in vain to shield myself
From all of this pain and hatred...

V.
I hate this...
       And it plagues me...

                                                                                                                       Someone wake me up?